Husband force her wife to get intimate relations (ML), is it OK?
If the husband wants to sleep with his wife and she does not want to and she hasn’t got a sickness or whatever, there is nothing wrong with her she just does not feel like it, and he ends up sleeping with her by force. Is this allowed in in the Islamic jurisprudence? is this rape or not?
Today many self styled Islamic clerics claim that this is totally OK in accordance with the authentic narrations of prophet Muhammed (PBUH).
In the Name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful.
All praise and thanks are due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon His Messenger.
Intimate relations are based on mutual feelings from both the husband and wife. We learn from the example of Prophet Muhammad, peace be upon him, that he used to be the best to his wives, and he never used force to satisfy his sexual desire. Rather, he criticized those who immediately jump into sexual intercourse without introductions that help feelings grow between the husband and wife. Therefore, intimate relations are not just acts to seek sexual gratification; they strengthen relationship between the couple.
The wife’s rejection could be attributed to many reasons that the husband should be diligent enough to understand. Among these reasons are: her emotional state could be down; she might be expecting her monthly cycle which makes her irritated; she might not like the way her husband approaches her and she does not want to talk about it; and there could be other reasons as well. Therefore, the husband should take the initiative and try to figure out the reason behind his wife’s rejection. Open, gentle communication between the husband and wife is important and can help resolve this issue.
Of course if the husband insists on sleeping with his wife by force, it would not be considered as rape since this is a right granted to him by marriage, but it is not in accordance with Islamic teachings either. It contradicts the sunnah of the Prophet, peace be upon him, and the ethics of intercourse.
Gentleness and kindness are among the manners of intimate relations in Islam.
Allah Almighty knows best.
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