How to deal with hothead husband


Please if you can help me I’m quite distressed at the moment. My husband and I married very young, during the first years of marriage we used to have a lot of violent arguments where he would be extremely angry and beat me and tell me he doesn't want me in his life. On one occasion when he was very angry he shouted talaq 3 times, and I said 'u didn’t mean that' and he shouted he did and slammed the door. We found out a few years later, after we started controlling our tempers that this all could constitute a divorce. I asked my husband if in his heart he wanted to divorce me he said he doesn’t remember anything because he was angry and it was all such a long time ago. I’m pregnant with my first child and I’m so worried our lives will be destroyed by this. Please help me.


In the Name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful.

All praise and thanks are due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon His Messenger.

I ask Allah to give you comfort and make things easy for you. I would like to answer your question in the following points:

1. Anger must be controlled as it may have untold circumstances. Your husband should seek professional counseling or take anger management lessons.

2. If divorce occurs at the time of such anger that impairs someone’s understanding completely to the point that he does not distinguish between right and wrong, it does not count. Imam Ibn Taymiyyah also argues that divorce pronounced during extreme anger is not also valid.

3. If divorce is pronounced three times, it counts only as one divorce.

Based on the abovementioned rules, it is advised that you see a qualified local imam whereby he could asses the whole situation and suggests some practical solutions for you.

Allah Almighty knows best.



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